J The Wind in the Willows
J Sang softly to me
J Follow my voice
J Wherever it leads
J From mountains, through valleys
J To deep rolling seas
J Born on the wings of the breeze I
Summer had long since been and gone.
Autumnhadanivedandtfrewoodsand hedgestumedfmmgreentoyellowtored
until, quite suddenly, the leaves onedayhadclatteredtoflwegmund.
Now everywhere was drab and damp and bare.
Behind the curtains screening frost-embroidered Mndours,
young animals squatted mund their molhefs he! to hear files of fir-off days,
of pirate treasure, knights in amour, noble heroes fighting for their lives.
At Toad Hall, too, thene'd been some storytelling - from Toad and about Toad.
To Toads great satisfaction.
Nowhestood, hisbacktoaglovurirag fire,
"about Toad.
Sony, Mole?
- Mole, old chap? - What?!
Toadmso sorry. I dropped off.
And while Toad was telling you about his new-found enthusiasm for skiing.
I do apologise. Do tell us how you're going to break the record.
Good heavens, that was ages ago!
- I was telling you about my imitation. - Imitation?
To a literary evening as the guest speaker.
Oh, I say!
And who's invited you to this evening?
Er, em...oh.
(Mumbles)
I didn't quite catch that.
I was invited by...the weasels.
- The weasels?! - Yes! The weasels.
- You're not going, are you? - Yes! I'll be a brilliant guest speaker.
Don't be ridiculous, Toad!
I don't re what you think.
I'm going to give them the benefit of my highly-intelligent literary mind.
(Weasel) Here's Toad now.
Mr Toad, Mr Toad.
What an honour to have you in our midst.
Our members are most anxious to have the pleasure
of hearing from such a talented, educated gentleman.
Ah? Oh, yes. Yes, I suppose so.
So shall we and the other members of the platform...
- Oi, that's you two! - Oh, yes, sorry.
Shall we then proceed into the 'all?
- Oh, well, that's very nice of you. - After you, Mr Toad.
Gentlemen... Gentlemen!
Your attention, please.
As you know, we are honoured tonight to have with us
Mr Toad of Toad 'all.
We are all aware, I'm sure, of Mr Toad's position in society,
- his fine home... - Oh, yes!
And his exquisite taste in furnishings.
Like Chippendale chairs.
Gentlemen, I ask you to welcome our honoured guest speaker,
Mr Toad of Toad 'all.
(Cheers)
Thank you. Thank you.
Em, Chief Weasel, Deputy Chief Weasels
and, em, weasels.
The subject of my little talk this evening is Toads.
Toads through the ages.
As you will no doubt be aware,
whenever danger has loomed, Toad has been in the midst of it.
Well, what a surprised)
Though surrounded by enemies, my forebears...
I thought you said you was a toad?
My forebears have... have been ioe cool in peril.
I say, it's awfully hot in here.
Cosy, Mr Toad. Cosy.
Er, yes. Yes.
Let me take you back to that year of 1123
when, in that land across the English Channel, a young toad...
...electricity. And that brings us to the present occupier of Toad Hall,
namely myself.
This is it, lads.
It has been most, er...
Goodness. It must be awfully late.
(Weasels shout)
Oh, you, em... haven't seen a gold watch, I suppose?
No, no, of course not.
- Well, I really must be going. - Oh, Mr Toad. Not rushing off?
- No, I won't hear of it. - But I-l...
No, no. You must partake of our 'ospitality. I insist.
- Oh! - Oh, my! Haven't you got lovely hands?
- There. - I say! Look here! Let me go!
No! a bit of it, Mr Toad.
'Ere you are and 'ere you'll stay, Mr Pompous Boring Guest Speaker Toad.
Until your friends cough up.
How dare you! If I was free of these bonds, I'd... Cough up?
Cough up what?
Cough up the ransom money.
Oh. Ransom. . .money?
Oh.
How much are you thinking of asking?
I'm demanding £50.
£50?
£50, otherwise...
£50. Hmm.
Well, it's not a great deal for someone with my position in society.
- Eh? - In fact, it's an insult.
Make it 100. Guineas. After all, I am Toad of...
Make it 100, eh?
And why not?
Why not?
100 guineas.
- 100 guineasl - It's an awful lot.
I'll say it is. I suppose we'll have to pay something for Toad's release.
How much do you think we should offer, Badger?
Well...
He is one of us, after all.
Even if he did get himself into this.
In all the circumstances, I would advise...
- Yes? - A shilling.
No, no. I always was too impetuous.
- Nothing. - But Badger...
Nothing. Not a penny.
Well, it's my opinion, Badger, that they won't let him go for nothing.
Let him go?
No question of those miserable, treacherous, ill-mannered louts doing that.
- But Badgerml - We shall set him free.
Hooray!
I owe it to his poor father's memory.
- That's absolutely more like it. - Oh, gosh! A mole! A mole!
Steady now, Mole, old fellow. We don't want to rush into a trap, too.
You're a jolly useful chap underground, Mole.
- It's home to me. Like the river to you. - Ah, the river. The river.
Sure this is the fight way, Mole?
Oh, yes. This will bring us up on a little rise above the weasels' den.
Good, good.
Come along, then. Let's step lively. We might not have much time.
Right, time's up. I'm here to take over.
Oh, hello. Come for a bit of a chinwag?
- I was just telling your friend here... - Oh, lummel
- Here we go again. - Not going too well?
Going? It's going fine. If you don't mind going off your chumpl
I can't stand any more. He never stops. On and on and on.
- Bad as that, eh? - Bad? It's worse.
Meaning again, you two?
You'll be doing outside guard duty all winter.
Anyway, you n cheer up. The Chief says we're going to get rid of Toad
one way or another.
Yes.
Well? What do you think, Badger?
It's a weasel hideout for sure.
Like as not, that's where theyve got Toad. Well done, Mole.
The question is how do we get him out of there?
We tackle those wretched weasels and we learn 'em!
But. . .gosh, Badger.
There are only three of us. We've no idea how many weasels are in there.
He's fight there, Badger. Can't see us fighting in through that lot.
- We won't need to. - Eh?
We'll have them come out to us.
And as they come out...
wallopl
But how will we get them out?
Ha. You see that chimney?
- Yes'? - 'finny sort oi thing, eh'?
- Yes? - Clangy, bangy sort of a chimney.
- I'm sorry, Badger. I don't quite see. - My word, but I do!
Just give me a minute or two to get round the back.
Ratty, what are you going to do?
I'm going to have a rattling good time!
Mole, take your courage in hand and your cudgel, too.
Ah, we'll whack 'em!
We will whack 'em!
And thump 'em. Come on.
- VVell done, Ratty. Now... - Thump 'em and bump 'em!
- And crack 'em! - And whack 'em!
Badger, there's something wrong here.
Why haven't they come out?
Mm. Why?
Well, only one thing for it.
If they won't come out, we must go in.
Ready?
- Charge! - River bankers! River bankers!
- River bankers! - Toad! Where are you, Toad?
Toad! Where are you?
- Toad'? - 'To-cad'?
There's no one there.
Absolutely no one.
Suppose they were never there at all?
There's lots of footprints here. And that...
Look, Ratty. A tie pin.
A particularly flashy tie pin.
With a fancy T on it.
- (All) Toad's tie pin! - Drat and botherationl We're too late.
- Theyve moved him on. - We'll just have to pay the ransom.
Nonsense, Ratty. Never. A matter of principle.
My old father used to say,
"Give a thief your finger and he'll take your hand."
Yes, Badger, butmwhat are we to do?
We found Toad once and we shall find him again.
Come along.
Yes, a great shame you don't have a motor r. I've had several, you know.
Of course I am, as it happens, a remarkably skilful driver...
- Toad? Toad? - Er, yes?
Shut up! Just keep quiet and listen.
- We're getting rid of you. - Ah! Conducting me back to Toad Hall!
No, Mr Toad.
- I mean, we're getting RID of you. - Oh.
Oh...ha-ha.
But we're ever such a kindly lot.
So long as you keep still, as long as you don't try to follow us,
there's quite a good chance that you won't fall off the cliff!
- Oh, well, that's... Cliff?! - Yeah.
I n just make out the jagged rocks hundreds of feet below.
Careful, Mr Toad. Careful! Ooohl
You nearly went then.
Ooohl Ooohl
So...
Au revoir, Mr Toad.
Or perhaps I mean...
goodbye-.
Oooohl
Don't leave me!
Hello? Dear Mr Weasel?
Sir?
Oh, don't leave me!
- Oh, dear. My legs... - Almost there, Mole.
- I n just make out the... - Goodness! It's one of them.
- (Toad) Hello? Hello? - Rattyl Badger! Look!
- Thank heavens! - My dear old weasel friends...
- Eh? - Please...
Please get me off this awful, awful cliff I
- Cliff? - I know I'm a silly, conceited animal.
Good heavens.
Can this be Toad?
I know I'm talkative! And self-centred!
- Oh? - Is he reformed?
Can the weasels have succeeded where I have failed?
Let me wash your dishes! Let me darn your socks!
- But please don't let me fall! - Oh, poor Toad.
Come on, Badger.
Yes.
- I suppose so. - (Toad) Don't leave me!
- Toad? - Oh! Ah! Badger!
Badger! Oh...ohhl
Ohhhhl
- Toad! Toad, are you all right? - Uh...yes.
No more earthly sorrows.
Take off this blindfold,
dear friends,
so that I may look upon your faces onoe again
before...
Before I...
There you are, Toad. Now, what's the matter?
Matter'?
Don't hide the truth from me, dear Ratty.
This poor, broken body has almost run its course.
Oh, Mole...
Don't weep for me.
Better plunge from a cliff in freedom than live on in captivity.
Cliff, Toad? What's all this about a cliff?
Do you not see it tower above us?
Do you not see its... its awful grandeur'?
- Wait just a sec. Where's...? - You panicked, Toad, and fell off a log.
- You've been made a fool of, Toad. - What?! Rubbish!
Iknewitwasalogl
A good performance, what? Eh?
And what about damin' the weasels' socks?
Oh, that?
I was just lulling them into a sense of false security
before I gave them a good thrashing!
- Indeed. - No need, eh?
Not now you've ransomed me. How much did they want?
- 100 guineas, Toad. - Oh, they didn't put it up, then?
- I mean, how much did you cough up? - Nothing.
- Oh, well, that's... Nothing?! - Not a penny.
Not a penny? But... But I...
But nothing, Toad. It was a matter of principle.
Matter of principle?
Give in to people like that and you give 'em a lioenoe to terrorise society.
Really? Just as well I got away by my own ingenuity, courage and resource.
Do you know those wretched weasels really thought they oould hold ME?
The Houdini of Toad Halll Would you mind untying my hands?
All right, Toad. Let me turn you over.
Oh! There.
Just a minute. There's a little note pinned to the back of your jacket.
"You n have him back for what he's worth."
- om - "And that's nothing."
Nothing?!
Nothing!
Well, really!
J Spin me a dream
J Woven silver and gold
J From sunshine and shadows
♪ And days long ago
J Where people are memories
J And stories unfold
J Willows
J The tales you have told me
J Wind in the Willows
J You just seem to know
J Who you n turn to
J And which way to go
J To unwind your wondrous mind
J Wind in the Willows
J Take me there I